The Illusion Of Control
Being a high-achiever is a dangerous game.
Typically children of unfair circumstances, we learned to adapt our world to our needs, a valuable skill, indeed.
As we grow older, however, the consequences of not having also learned to adapt ourselves to our world become increasingly dire.
Need proof? Just look at Elon Musk.
The very thing that brings us all the "success" we relish is the same thing that brings us all of our suffering. As we realize this, we fear what happens if we stop trying so hard.
With practice, we soften, giving blossom to a much more nourishing, sustainable, wholesome form of success.
Highlights
These are some of my clients’ favorite posts over time…
It’s The End Of The World As We Know It
It’s taken me years to muster the courage to write this something like this.
And I realized, if I’m not willing to say this, who will? What’s the cost of not speaking up? Of the harm we’re currently experiencing, inflicting?
The ‘How’ Is As Important As The ‘What’ In Self-Care
Forcing yourself to exercise, meditate, or let go, is arguably harmful. The same goes if the motivation for these actions is fixing or improving your broken self. These are actually forms of self-hatred.
Conversely, enjoying kicking the feet up on the couch and watching a lighthearted and funny TV show motivated by self-love can be really helpful.
Meet Andy Wolfe
You can think of me as a gentle personal trainer for your mind.
Action And Reward
It’s undeniable that there’s more to this world, this life, this existence when one closes one's eyes to meditate — we touch into that place, that stillness, that peace, that from which everything emerges.
The Key To Meditation — This Simple Shift Changes Everything
Meditation isn't a practice of finding stillness or peace. Minds wander! It's what they do.
Meditation is a practice of making peace with the natural busyness of the mind.
Reframing Self-Love As Productive
Still in a place of fear, thinking about “what if” her son doesn’t write good college essays, she said “well, if I fail at something, at least I can say I worked really hard.”
I responded, well, what if that became...
“If I fail at something, at least I can say I loved myself.”
How To Build A Life Of Meaning
I think there’s this myth that your dream job or partner or whatever just magically appears…or manifests…one day…when you're ready…if you've meditated really hard…or something.
Spoiler alert: it doesn’t!
Instead, it's a series of small, few-degree turns that bring us home.
So, how do we choose which turns to make?
Well, in computer science, the fastest way to find an item in a sorted list is a binary search.
And that’s exactly how we do this.
Mindfulness Resources
Consolidated list of mindfulness resources
Brands I Trust For Healthy Living
When I learn about a thing, I go deep. People who know me well will often ask what I recommend when they’re making a decision about something I’ve considered with intentionality, confident that “I have a spreadsheet for that.” In this phase, it feels relevant to share this list of brands I trust as I div into all the health things…
A Lesson In Financial Integrity From A Costa Rican Cabbie
Money is at the core of so many of our choices, fears, and…breaches in integrity.
After learning some of Pascual's joys and sorrows, I felt a growing connection. I decided to broach the income topic — I asked if he'd ever found himself in a situation where he could earn money by doing something that left him feeling uneasy. A modest smile appeared on his face…
Surrender
I'm increasingly realizing that it only takes complete willingness to step into, and stay, in the void. And then just like that, once I've fully surrendered and let go of what happens next, I'm only there for a heartbeat, before I'm reborn into something, somewhere even more beautiful and magical than I could have dreamt.
Don’t Go Back To Sleep
Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing,
there is a field. I’ll meet you there.
When the soul lies down in that grass,
the world is too full to talk about.
Ideas, language, even the phrase each other
doesn’t make any sense.
Practical Mindfulness 🙃
An everyday tip
How To Choose A Meditation Teacher
Priorizing wellness in 2024? Here are a couple tips that may help 🙏🏻.…
Waking Up Is Scary
Waking up is scary. The ego likes being in charge. As I awaken, I increasingly realize it's not. And that's hard. So, I don't force it. I practice being with the fear, as I gaze across the abyss, into the sublime. And I thank this precious armor for keeping me safe, for protecting me from what's still too magnificent for me to fully behold.
It’s Okay If The Holidays Are Tough
It’s okay if the holidays are tough. Here's a practice I did today that may help 💙
A Quick, Simple Tip For The Holidays
Here's a quick, simple tip I've been offering to clients for navigating difficult situations over the holidays. It's one of the most valuable things I've learned over the years...if you're dreading time with a difficult family member, reframe: so many amazing opportunities to practice 🙃 anywho, hope this can be helpful for you, too!
Thanissara On Going Beyond The Walls Of Mind
In our third event, we explore the Heart Sutra, and specifically investigate dissolving the seeds of violence that arise from the creation of the “other” via separative consciousness. When we let go of this over reliance on the cognitive frame, we can find deep peace. We believe this shift allows the systemic change we so desperately need in the world, today.