Courage

Someone close to me recently told me they admire my courage...

It was the first time I really paused to reflect on it.

I often get to the edge of a cliff, peer down into the abyss, and think to myself, "f####@&". Then, I walk back until I can't see the bottom anymore. I start running, and right as I get to the end of the road, I just say "f#@& it!", and jump.

Sometimes I look back, and it only hurt when I hit the bottom. Once I crawl my way out, I tend to take those jumps less frequently in the future.

Most times, there's just fear in the free fall part (which soon stabilizes)...and then there's either a landing on the other side (sometimes soft, usually not)...or I'm still falling 🤷🏻.

There's a fine, curvy line for me between courage and recklessness. I think I used to air on the side of recklessness...blessed with fortune, it often looked like courage. These days, it's definitely more a practice of courage, tho some sprinkles of recklessness still find their way on top from time to time!

What’s the difference? There’s fear with both. For me, it’s in the intent. With courage, the intent feels wholesome. There’s a trust, faith…in nature, science, someone I respect, myself, silence. There’s curiosity, openess, a desire to learn. That’s the source of its power, for sure. With recklesness, the ego is in the driver’s seat. And it almost always (eventually) drops me into an abyss, often flat on my face!

What about you...what do you do at the edge of the cliff? Do you tend to jump too seldom or too often? Why?

Pictured: me taking a jump ~15 years ago…pretty sure this one was lacking in the wise courage department 🙃